When you think you heard enough in Venezuela…

May 27, 2009

–Iris Varela urges the President to name a regional Vice-President for Tachira state and all other states that have an opposition Governor.

Jeez, wouldn’t it be easier to not let them run?

–After Chavez said yesterday Brazilian companies were exempt from nationalization, Aregntina’s Cristina Fernandez complained about the discrimantory treatment between the two buddy countries. Venezuela explained there was no discrimination and Argentina said it was “satisfied” with the explanation.

I guess Cristina was reminded by Canciller Maduro that Venezuela paid Techint for Sidor over twice what Chavez said the company was worth and assured her the recently nationalized Argentinean pipe and briquette companies would be equally overcompensated.

–And the Head of the consumer protection agency is asking for someone to be jailed in the case of the cars owned by Globovision owner Zuluaga. Meanwhile Minsiter Assami assures us that something crooked was going on.

I don’t know if Zuluaga violated some rule or regulation or not, but what these guys don’t seem to understand is that they only go after opposition people. Clearly, if the Government only allows colonoscopies on opposition members, the incidence of colon cancer on Chavistas will drop to zero. I mean, whatever happened to the investigation on the Maletagate cases? The Citibank building? Papi, Papi in Sucre? Shoudl I go on or you get the idea?

–But in any case the problem will be solved next week, when according to Deputy Sanguino the National Assembly will approve a Bill to regulate the price of cars.

Fantastic! Cadivi approves no dollars for making cars, forcing companies to import parts at the swap rate price and companies will be forced to sell the cars as if they had imported parts at one third the price. These guys really get it!

–And in State owned company Bauxilum, Chavismo lost its control over the union to former Causa R leader Morocoima who is now an independent, just when Chavismo has called for an offensive to take over all unions in Guayana.

I wonder if Chavez’ threat last week to the unions to fire them all like he did in PDVSA if they gave him trouble had something to do with this.

–And when a third case of food poisoning took place this week in the Ministry of Education’s food program this week, the Minister immediately came up with an explanation: “Sabotage!”

Fortunately, half of Venezuelans oppose the Government so that they can always find someone to blame for their incompetent management.

–And to celebrate ten years of his program Alo Presidente, Chavez threatens to talk for four days in a row.

Too many questions surrounding this point. Will he go to the bathrrom? Will there be commercials when he does it or just an empty chair? How many nationalziations will he announce in those four days? Does the whole Cabinet have to attend all four days? Who will be running the country? (Sorry, dumb question, nobody, as usual…). If Chavez drinks only coffee for four days, what will he be saying at the end of four days?

20 Responses to “When you think you heard enough in Venezuela…”

  1. dillisw Says:

    I think I heard Chavez say the cadena over the next four days will be mainly afternoons and early evenings, but I may be wrong.

    Perhaps at the same time, we shall see all sorts of invasions and harassment by DISIP, Indepabis and co whilst Globovision has to run the Cadenas. Perhaps the Vargas Llosa’s will be kidnapped and ‘dropped off’ at Maiquetia as well.

  2. jrsam Says:

    Oh, but happy days at the video rental shops :)

  3. Otro Roberto Says:

    “If Chavez drinks only coffee for four days, what will he be saying at the end of four days?”

    I believe the same amount of non-sense country-damaging garbage as always, but at a quite faster speed and more nervously as normal.

  4. marc in calgary Says:

    how exactly will you gauge the nonsense if he does drink only coffee for 4 days?

    this one’s really got me stumped… what could he possibly have up his sleeve? a complete overhaul of the countries communication network? so intensive, that it needs to be done, out of sight???

    hold on folks!

  5. Tarzan Says:

    Sorry OtroRoberto but:
    “I believe the same amount of non-sense country-damaging garbage as always, but at a quite faster speed and more nervously as normal.”

    is not the answer, it will be that to the fourth!!!

    Sure the rentals will increase and cartoon network and others will hit a maximun audience in venezuela…

    ah I forgot all this with a satelite transmission (only a logo in the screen for sure).

  6. Robert Says:

    Well there is the democracy forum beginning Thursday with Mario Vargas Llosa that Chavez might be interested in blacking out. Both Llosa’s got hassled coming in the airport but this one is too famous to be escorted out of the country for speaking his mind. This has to be extremely stressful for Chavez to have such a worldwide respected journalist dissing him on his own turf. Is it yet illegal to speak bad of chavez in venezuela?

  7. gabrield Says:

    Miguel, here’s some comic relief. I heard CVG is looking for financing and has hired a bank for financial advice. I seem to remember someone telling me that the books are a mess and that they needed USD 2bn-USD 2.5bn to recapitalize the companies under its watch. Coupled with the Crystallex/Las Cristinas mess and the recent nationalizations, why would anyone lend to these guys? Why even bother hiring an advisor?

  8. Deanna Says:

    Thank God for cable and satellite dishes!!!! Robert, if it were already illegal to speak ill of his majesty, the rat king of Sabaneta, at least 9/10 of the country would be in jail. Oh, sorry, the government would then have to wall off the whole country because there wouldn’t be enough room in the jails to hold all of Chavez’s critics.

  9. concerned Says:

    Last night, while watching Chris Rock exercise his right of freedom of speach during a pre-election recorded show, I couldn’t help but to feel really lucky to be a native citizen of the “Evil Empire”. Chris was unmercifully beating up John McCain and George Bush while promoting, yet still taking jabs at Obama. Not only can Chris do this in public, but he gets paid millions to do it. There are no secret service officials waiting to take him to jail or to the airport. Chris may not be on G.W’s christmas list, but the fact remains that he could say these things without repercussions.

    Then I was thinking about the possibility for an equal, public verbal bashing of Chavez, and I laughed harder at that than at Chris’s material. There is no comparison…I wish VZ the freedom to do the same within my lifetime, but that possibility has about as much chance of success as any cooky plan this government throws on the table.

  10. Kepler Says:

    Concerned,
    I see the same thing here in “imperialist” Europe. I sometimes watch German state TV, ZDF and ARD and I always feel impressed when I see those state journalists grilling in the most merciless way both government (including the chancellor) and opposition. We see in Belgium, Germany, Scandinavia, France, even the UK some very harsh debates where you see the top of the government debating on a continuous basis with several of the main parties in the opposition.
    One think I like here particularly is to see next to each other the conservatives, the liberals (different sort than in the US), the social democrats, the ecologists and even the extreme left.

    OT: is Baduel still in jail?

  11. Escualidus Arrechus Says:

    “Hey, this is Europe. We took it from nobody; we won it from the bare soil that the ice left. The bones of our ancestors, and the stones of their works, are everywhere. Our liberties were won in wars and revolutions so terrible that we do not fear our governors: they fear us. Our children giggle and eat ice-cream in the palaces of past rulers. We snap our fingers at kings. We laugh at popes. When we have built up tyrants, we have brought them down. And we have nuclear *fucking* weapons. ”

    Always loved that quote.

  12. dillisw Says:

    Well Chavez has started talking. Luckily a cadena hasn’t been called

  13. Larry Says:

    Kepler, not only is Baduel in jail, he will not get out for he’s guilty of conspiring against Chavez (11A) and bought himself some time when he was double-crossed and subsequently flipped sides to rescue Chavez. Chavez kept him close after that (keep your enemies close) and then framed him with the nude pictures on the AN website (who else?). When Baduel the civilian took an active stance including his electoral performance, it was time to jail him.

  14. ErneX Says:

    You guys MUST see this video, I’m speechless

    Sucre governor being a malandro as usual.

  15. SA Says:

    Oh, my God, I am speechless.

  16. Roberto( no el otro, sino este) Says:

    Verga, que bolas!

  17. liz Says:

    the question is who filmed it? gosh.. I have no words!!!
    complot, traicion, ta’ preso.. mirror feelings, no?

  18. Kepler Says:

    What a sad country!
    And that kind of scum is everywhere in Venezuela.

  19. jsb Says:

    He sounds like an angry alcoholic.


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